aLoha, i'm Lissa (AKA The BlueStarLoser) and this is my diary. hopefully that was obvious enough. anyway, reminder: everyone handles their anger differently.
i hate feeling alone. i've been in a really bad mood lately and i think it's because i took too many hours this semster (6 courses . . . 18 hours . . . stupid), am out of shape (i was already of out shape and i've been giving up lately), my room's not straightened (still . . . yes, i know. it's been like this all semester) and i'm just lonely. i don't have anyone that i can randomly call up on the phone and say "we're gonna hang out. be ready when i get there". and i've been thinking about my exes a lot lately. like i still talk to all of them on the phone and all, but i miss hanging out on a regular basis. i don't want a relationship like we used to have when we were dating, but i miss the together time. i really miss them all with the exception of RS who is just messed up to beging with. i'm still gonna keep in touch with him, but when i think back on it, i don't think i ever wanted to date him and i don't think i ever cared for his friendship. even now, i'm going to keep in touch just for the sake of keeping in touch. weird how this stuff works out. overall, i'm just in a bad mood and hopefully this will be the last week of it.
oh yeah, on the brighter side of things, i've been writing again and my work is a lot better. why is it that people always write better when they're upset or extremely happy? why can't there be a neutral mode?
